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December 18, 2005
Productive Day
Today was a very productive day. I went out and got a couple new pictures for my bathroom wall.
Then after hanging my pictures I was inspired to build a christmas present. So I went out to one of the abandoned house down the block and grabbed some wood.
I must have interrupted something important -- as I was looking around for just the right piece of wood a junkie came around the corner. Seeing me he stopped suddenly and backed up aroudn the corner. He waited there the entire time I looked for the pieces I'd take. And seeing him there I decided to take much longer than necessary just to find out how long he'd wait.
A few seconds after I left I saw him rush in in my absence.
I guess I should have known better, but quite a lot of the wood in the abandoned house was rotten and falling apart so in order to finish my project I had to go back to get some more wood.
By the time I left for my second load it was dark, but as I left the house with my arms loaded with wood I could just make out who it was calling after me. "Hey. Hey, you."
It was the short little junkie that keeps knocking on my door trying to sell me shit. Saturday morning he woke me up by pounding on my door. He wanted to sell me a level. "USA level. That's some good shit. USA. Not from Hong Kong or no shit like that. USA. It's real tough. Real good American shit. It's even got magnets on it. Three of 'em. And this like rope thing. You can put it on your key chain or whatever. Wha' d'ya say? Ten bucks?"
Somehow I found the strength to resist and shooed him away.
Tonight he chased me down with a light. "It's a real nice one. You can use it when you're fixin' your car. Plugs right into your cigarette lighter 'n shit. Wha' d'ya say?"
Posted by calculatoronfire at December 18, 2005 10:18 PM
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Comments
Oh my god. Choking on laughter. A death of laughingness.
Okay,
A. Your bathroom is creepy.
B. Yes especially the "creepy holographic Jesus"
C. I love the labels. Oh, crying with laughter over "not jesus, monkey" and "not jesus, painting"
okay wait...i have to laugh. okay i'm back.
D. choking on my tongue with laughter. "jesus hanging out all calm."
okay you SO need to be a docent at a museum. what an awesome tour THAT would be.
actually, the mirror looks all rustic etc. nice.
USA level. :) cute, cute cute cute...
oh, thanks for starting my day right. laughing...
Posted by: d2ana at December 19, 2005 09:04 AM
Will turning your bathroom into a Jesus Shrine cancel out the all of the Going to Hell Points that were accumulated by the Camel-Sex/Jesus Christmas card?
Posted by: tfg at December 19, 2005 09:24 PM
My bathroom creppy? What about the happy, smiling toilet paper gnome? Could he smile so contently surrounded by creepiness?
I think not.
I certainly hope my bathroom will aid my soul's chances at redemption. Everything else is pulling me in the opposite direction.
Posted by: brian at December 20, 2005 01:57 PM