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October 26, 2005
Eviction Process (cont) pt3
Sunday I talked to my tenants and they told me they'd be out of the house by the next day. I'd have had no reason not to believe if I had just gone on the looks of the house -- everything was packed up in boxes and scatered around the house. I had more to go on, however. They'd been saying they'd leave the house "tomorrow" for over a month and half. Still for some reason I believed them this time.
My faith in them was shattered later that day when I answered the door to an enraged middle-aged couple. They threatened me, told me they called 911 and in the end informed me their imprisoned son's baby's mother and her family were not going to leave my house.
Monday when I came home from work with eviction paper-work in hand my neighbors/tenants called me into their house no sonner than I stepped out of my car. "Mr. Brian. Come in here. Mama wants to talk to you."
Shit. What is it this time? I thought to myself. Outwardly I managed a half-hearted "I'll be over there later."
"No. Mama gots here pension check. She gots to give you the rent."
Much more excited this time, "I'll be there in a minute."
I got together the neighbors' bills and went back over to the house. They called me inside as soon as I got to the wide-open door.
I went inside and saw the adults of the hosue crowded around the kitchen table drinking 40s while a the kids ran around the house in diapers at most. "Nini, get Mr Brian his money." The older woman called to her daughter.
The daughter reached into a plastic storage box and pulled out a wad of 50s
.
I was impressed. I don't think I'd ever seen that many 50s in one place before. She handed me the entire wad - 36 of them. "That's what we owe you."
I took my time and counted it twice. 36. "This is $1800."
"That's what we owe you, right?"
"Most of it. You owe me $2100."
"I thought you said it was $1800."
"That was before you decided to stay for this month."
"What? Uh uh."
"I'm only charging you up to the 15th right now."
"How can you charge us that kind of money for this place. You ain't done shit to fix it while we lived here."
I looked around at the refrigerator and stove I gave them. The ceiling I replaced, the ceiling fan I put in, the whole in the wall I patched up, and the freshly broken windows I'd have to fix.
"Ok. Here's a deal: If you leave by the end of the month I won't charge you at all for the month. If you're still here on the 1st of Novemeber you owe me for a full month plus November." Then I wrote it down on their receipt and my records so I can bring it to court, like I'm 90% certain I'll have to do.
"Don't worry," the older woman said in a disgusted tone, "we ain't stayin' here no way."
Posted by calculatoronfire at October 26, 2005 08:48 PM
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Comments
$600/month for a rowhouse?!? You are the Mother Theresa of slumlords. Remind me to come find you when my lease is up. I'll quit my job, get on the dole, rent some illegitimate children and we'll do this propertied-owner, class expoitation thing up right.
Posted by: tfg at October 26, 2005 09:08 PM
Hey, seriously, I'll pay $700 a month for that place.
Posted by: Malnurtured Snay at October 26, 2005 10:28 PM
I was charging $500 a month. They owed me for utilities too.
Posted by: brian at October 26, 2005 10:36 PM
Shit, one of my hobbies is home renovations. I'd be THRILLED to pay $500 a month, AND fix the place up, provided you pay for the materials. That's the deal I have with my current roommate, and I'm in heaven.
Posted by: Freak Magnet at October 27, 2005 01:48 PM
Yeah, but I shouldn't imagine that a landlord is in a hurry to rent a house to someone called 'Freak Magnet'
Posted by: Sam at October 29, 2005 04:36 AM
Hilarious tfg. Absolutely hilarious.
At least you recouped some of your money, I'd still evict them though.
Posted by: at October 31, 2005 11:21 AM
Sam, all my landlords will tell you I'm a dream tenant.
Seriously.
I always pretend I own the place.
Posted by: Freak Magnet at November 2, 2005 05:24 PM
I'd rather have a tenant that goes by "Freak Magnet" than one that calls her son "Dookie"
Posted by: brian at November 2, 2005 06:43 PM