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September 06, 2005
The Great Floods
My mom has been visiting for nearly a week now. So far it hasn't been as bad as expected. She's been pretty well behaved when not flooding my basement.
She got right to that the first day she was left alone in my house and decided to go for a repeat last night. the flooding doesn't bother me too much, however, as uses each new flood as an excuse to scrub the basement floor.
When she told me about the first flood she got me a little scared, though. I walked into my house, cleaned for the first time in months, and immediately she proclaimed, "I think I screwed up."
Putting together the facts:
- 1) the house was cleaned
- 2) My mom claimed she "screwed up"
- 3) Cleaning requires moving things
- 4) While moving things she could have uncovered one of the porno stashes
Like I did when I was 13, I began rehearsing a defense in my head. I only keep them to give to the neighborhood kids probably wouldn't work. They're not mine wouldn't fly either. Especially if she found the weird gay cartoon porno pictures the previous owners left stashed in the basement. Framed pictures I only still have because I get a kick out of trying to send them home with visitors and I've never had a visitor that doesn't think the pictures are too creepy to be hung on their wall.
Only after I decided to own up to the pornos did she tell me, "I flooded the basement."
What a relief.
Posted by calculatoronfire at September 6, 2005 02:13 PM
Comments
Decided to own up or actually owned up? Does Mom frequent your blog? Hi Brian's Mom!
Posted by: mike at September 6, 2005 04:18 PM
Thankfully mommy pre-empted an actual disclosure with the announcement of the flood.
Like my mom would be had she found a stack of pornos in my house, she would find this here innerweb site "filthy and disgusting."
Posted by: brian at September 6, 2005 05:29 PM